shut up shut up, don't wanna hear it

it's not that i don't want to forget the bad things that have happened.
but honestly it's difficult and it takes time.
too bad i've got to bring up such a negative post about life because oh well, sometimes you can't keep blogging about the ups of life right?
it's never smooth-sailing.
so i will strip myself bare of self-denial today and let my words run free as they deserve to occasionally.
it might hurt, or seem accusatory, but if the shoe fits, then put it on.

well well.
it has been about 5 months or so since we've settled into college already.
time flies pretty fast, and everything else that has happened in PL seems to be in a fading distance away.
it's nice to reminisce about the past but sometimes your old, unhappy thoughts will return unfailingly as you do so.
the bad times, the bad happenings, the bad memories will slowly haunt you one by one.
you don't wish to remember them 'cos you've long moved on, but sometimes you will unknowingly flip back to your old chapters of life.
and that's what inspired me to tweet that ^ (above picture)
i strongly believe in my own words (LOL EGO) because in life you are bound to meet people who turn out to be shockingly unpleasant.
and it is sad that we all might hurt someone in one way or another.
but anyway, i've encountered several of such incidences, and this is for all you people out there who think you may have been forgotten cleanly already.
hell no, i will always remember what you've done to me.
people say to forgive and forget, but obviously this is only what the naive will do.
really?
you think life is going to be a bed of roses if you just forgive people and that the world will be a happier place?
well i don't blame the optimist in you but sometimes you gotta admit that the things people do unto you will somehow stay with you for life.
it's not the exact words someone might have said, nor is it the exact expressions the person showed towards you, but it's more of the rollercoaster of emotions you experience at that very point in time.
and that rollercoaster obviously consists of 90% anger lol.
ok that's besides the point.
i don't know if you would call me a person who bears grudges easily, but personally, i don't think i do, unless the impact someone has had on me is great.
sad to say i've been there and done that, couple of times.
so yeah, i don't exactly HATE anybody (oh well well she's living in denial you may say), but yes, i just want to tell everyone who's screwed me up (no sick thoughts please) in life - thanks for the memories.
be it good or bad, sweet or bitter, lovely or unpleasant, i thank you.
thank you for teaching me much in life that there is a bitch inside a person, that you don't cry and wimp over what someone did to you for ages.
thank you for letting me understand what it feels like to be driven by misery, and thereby succeeding.
well my only goal to prove someone wrong was to be happy.
and i honestly am very happy now.
thank you for allowing me to experience all this, a daunting time of being hurled shit at.
i hope you are as happy as i am now, 'cos i know i won't ever forget you.
the day i get married, have kids, grow old, and even till the day i die, i swear that deep down i recognise you and all you did.
you may warn me not to harbour my hatred to my coffin, but what is life if you don't feel?
feel with your heart.
feel, everything, with your heart.
the reason why god gave us a heart is probably to feel a thousand emotions, and some maybe beneficial or detrimental, but well, some things in life you just can't forget.
so yes.
thanks guys, for the memories.
thanks for building my strength up, thanks for teaching me valuable lessons in life, thanks for making me into who/what i am today.
i am a stronger me today because of who you are and what you've done.

i won't apologise for the angst (whatever you want to call it) in my post tonight.
just felt like ranting today for some apparent reason.
maybe because i'm hooked on to my childhood song, thnks fr th mmrs by fall out boy, again.
so angst that i like it.
nah probably 'cos i've heard some reflective words today too.
well yes, so i guess i'll head to bed now.

goodnight zombies.

bored post for a bored girl

yesss i'm here only because i'm procrastinating.

well, RIGHT after this post i'm going off to study ok!!!

i just finished peeling my garlic sprouts to cook for lunch later :>

mmm yumz i love garlic sprouts they're my favourite veggie of all time, but sadly no one really knows what they are... :(

anyway, i'm lagging behind in the amount of work i've got to finish, and that just sucks.

that's why yesterday i went to create a to-do for today on this app called wunderlist; there's both the phone and web app too!

pretty cool stuff.

oh yeah did i mention i downloaded this super coolass calorie counter & diet tracker app called myfitnesspal too!

it's this FREAKING cool app (and no, i'm not exaggerating) that you can actually log 99.9% of things you eat (it's not 100% 'cos they don't have my super asian veggie garlic sprouts hmmph)!

it's a personalized profile for you to key in your height, weight, desired weight, lifestyle, age blah blah.

so through all this personal data you log into the app they will generate a desired RDC (recommended daily calories LOL THIS WAS MY OWN ACRONYM) for you!

recording down what you eat also becomes a lot more convenient through their barcode scanner function!!!

you can even select your appropriate portions, create your own recipes, and choose from a huge list of exercise routines you engage in.

cool potatoes eh!!!

so i just started this whole calorie thing yesterday and i took in 920cal but burned off 220cal through exercise.

i even had 500cal remaining at the end of yesterday and they told me to EAT MORE....

oh okay if you say so...

meh you may think i'm obsessed with losing weight or something, but honestly no, I'M NOT.

you may say "this kind of people who deny even further are clearly obsessed", oh just shut up.

i honestly need to lose all that belly fat. (AND MY THIGHS AND HIPS ARE GROSS YUCKS K GTG TO STUDY)

will be on airplane mode for the day so i'll most probably be uncontactable :P

byebye.

we're catching lightning in a bottle

hello!

finally the mid-year exams are over and school's out! :)

so happy that that the june holidays are here, i guess everyone out there deserves a nice break from the hectic routine of school life.

well i honestly don't want to think about school.

i know my results are going to be as crappy as it can get 'cos i know i screwed most of my papers up.

looking at how i fared for the chemistry mcqs and gp paper 2, meh, even that tiny gleaming bit of hope has died.

HAHAHA what a joke.

never mind, like i've said before, i'll cross the bridge when i come to it.

since the school break is here, the first thing i would want to do is catch up on my sleep.

this is no joke.

my pimples are AWFUL - time to drink up and sleep more...

need to stop sleeping at 3am oh my god.

how to get rid of this habit ugh... :(

anywayyyy one week of my june holidays have been eaten up by extra lessons back in school.

well honestly i think last week was pretty memorable, 'cos i had so much fun with the class. :)
slacking/not-slacking during pw, being half-awake during the afternoon lectures, having 3-hour breaks like during the temporary timetable (which meant heading out of school for lunch)... haha how can you not love 1sr20.

so anyway here are photos from last wednesday, class photo-taking day :)

i truly enjoyed preparing the words for the class the day before!

as well as cutting and pasting everything, the final product was really amazing!

thanks guys for all your help too woohoo love you all :*

love the effect when everything's put together!!!

oh yeah we decided to take individual mugshots and make a collage out of it :-)

and guess what hahaha i love it so much it's my lock screen & twitter background!

this earned itself 72 likes on instagram too! ^^

so yeah here's the remaining madness of the day - no words can express how much fun i had that day and how much love i felt around the class HAHAHA.

oh my god this is sounding too cheesy but whatever you get the idea :)

we're synonymous with unity!

^ i love the epic-ness of how we always imitate teachers hahahaha it's sooooo hilarious i honestly feel like rofl-ing at times :'D thanks for always being retarded and making me laugh like crazy all the time! if not lessons would be so dull :(

^ my shit buddy yueenn woohoo! :)

^ wazzup girlies i love you all :* mmm okay i guess no amount of filter (2nd photo) can make me a little less tanned oops. but it's okay 'cos it's a photo with my bundles of joy hehe. oh anyway can we all take a moment to admire mavis' face in the above 3rd picture hahahaha the pedo mugger indeed :'D

^ yeah 1sr20's class photo!!! honestly i think the photo was horribly taken hahaha but hopefully it'll turn out great on the dslr :)

^ six girls. yup that's right! HAHA! okay no i'm kidding. but thanks for making recess times a whole bunch of fun guys love you all to the moon and back :)

^ jennee!!! my favourite whatsapp buddy hehe 'cos she is too cute :) love you babyyy thanks for all the epic conversations we have and the times we just spazz together over -ahemz- yup hehehe will always be here for you! *inserts heart-shape here because blogger doesn't allow me to idk why* yeah and our non-stop conversations (especially during chinese class) will always be remembered ~

^ our mugger mavis hahaha! omg it's pretty cool how we became so close when we moved to jc 'cos honestly despite the fact that we've been in the same school for 10 years and in the same class for 7, i think i've never spoken more than 5 sentences to you before lolol omg. glad to be in the same class as you this time and got to know you a lot better! :) CHONVIS FTW. okay just saying ahahahha

^ i adorable or not hahahahahaha jkjk. heheh 3/4 of my wonderful pw group! here's to a great year ahead doing our wr and op together!!! and yay i love your "legendary" patty it's my favourite song woohoo!

^ our silent killer vaneh hahaha!!! thanks for being the best rebuttal everytime SOME THINGS happen -.- honestly i have no idea why everytime when i do stupid things like trip over my own leg or other plain retarded stuff you are always there to witness it HAHAHA oh god so paiseh pls!!!

^ omg pls look at the colour contrast...... ok putting that aside hi maria! our scary big sister who is ever-scary and snappy hahaha you go girl!! thanks for being with me all the way since cg orientation, it's been a great journey and i think i have been influenced by you~ have i become more scary? i hope so HAHAHAH! i am too weak. anw thanks for being such a concerning friend :) really appreciate it.

^ hi divaaaa we should go out to eat more often!!! so we can talk more :-) and yes eat more so you put on the weight you need to as well heheheh

^ the green paper people :) yupppp omg this kid-ding is super ding-dong all the time i swear hahaha see the pun i just made there :P okay anw yup thanks for being a great cg rep and doing everything for us!!! no wonder you aged a 100 years since school started ahahaha :'D

^ hello boss!!! it's been great knowing you hehe! thanks for a nice dinner after timekeeping @ pizza hut :-) really got to know a bit more about you~~ the stories you tell are really epic and funny hahahaha!!! :') thanks boss!

^ ok the photo too dark and i too cui already but anyway, sup sean! THE LITTLE HIPPO HAHAHA. thanks for being sucha loyal friend to us all and always just, not pangseh-ing any of us :) thanks ahhhh hahaha and i think it must be boring to be surrounded by girls all the time eh lol sorry if we get carried away at times :P

^ ahahaha the awkward gap between us lolol! aiya but cannot get too close to chonwey la later mavis jealous :< my mortal wassup!!! i am still awaiting your "surprise" helloooo. so much for 'expecting the unexpected' hahahaha! :P

sorry if this post's kinda personal, but yes i am truly happy where i am now :-)

glad to have moved on.

xoxo 1sr20 we are legendary



on a side note i just made some chocolate truffles hahaha wonder how they'd turn out!!! but i over-boiled the whipping cream damn it. will instagram it later maybe ;-)