Enough is enough.

it's been accumulated for a week.
i've had enough, so i decided to let it all out here.

kind of decided that i'm going to make it known.
i'm not being attention-seeking or anything, but i really want to let you all know how i feel.
firstly, i have already come to accept reality, that i will always be different from every single one of you. EVERY ONE.
i have also come to realise that it'll never be possible to try and stop you all, and try to make everyone of you perfect.
who am i even to try and make people perfect?
i'm not that noble and great either, but i'm just doing my job.
sometimes i feel that you all know how i would feel if i saw you all like that, but just do it on purpose to provoke me...
i try so hard, but what do i get?
not only do you repeat it over and over again, but all i earn is your hatred, your annoyance and your cold shoulders.
though i've learnt to shut one eye at times, it just irks me to see it happening over and over again.
do you know why i scold you all except her?
that's because i care! I CARE!
i care as a close friend and that's why i want to help you change for the better.
if not, i would just leave you in the lurch.
shouldn't friends care for one another, tell you off strictly when you're wrong, and always be there for one another?
friends, are supposed to help you.
remember?
but you seem to take the criticism too hard.
why?
i guess all my effort's wasted.

secondly, there's one thing i completely dislike about odd numbers.
friends? cliques?
yes, there's bound to be some sort of division and pairing when it comes to that.
you have you, you have you, you have you and me?
to be honest i really feel like nothing but a stray dog that follows people home.
and i feel like an intruder, who cuts in and tries to fit in with any of your conversations.
i really wish you all could be more sensitive, or myself to try and be less sensitive.
i really feel lonely and left out.
and what i do, no one ever appreciates.
i've never seen any of you do a thank-you note for anything, or something encouraging when i've done countless of these for you all.
only when i be a thick-skinned person and ask from you all then will you do so.
come to think of it, i feel like i've sacrificed too much.
i am just being honest with myself, no offence intended.
i'm trying so hard to keep things together, but i'm the only one falling apart now.
none of you guys actually ever bother to start a conversation with me, and always scout off to some other place w/o even asking me.
always creating personal inside jokes that i will never understand or know of.
and when i don't look okay, what do you all do?
nothing.
just a casual question, i choose to say no, and you think i'm fine.
i've tolerated enough, and i think it's really about time i had let it all out.
do i ever mean anything to you guys?
or am i just some annoying, bossy, PMS-ing nobody to you?
after all that i've done, and if i'm that annoying and worthless in your eyes, then i'm sorry i think you don't deserve me.
well, if you care for me, then show it, okay!
just in case you can't understand how, some people build a wall around themselves to see who cares enough to tear them down.
i'm beyond my limits already.

i just wanna let you all know that i care a lot for you guys, but it's a constant one-way sacrifice that i've been making, and i'm very sick of that.
please, i really can't take it any longer.
if you really care for me as a friend then prove it through your actions.
i'm tired of all this drama.

my arms are tired of being the only one piecing back the fragments of our memories back together.

friendship's a two-way issue, and since one doesn't care, the other remaining party is going to experience nothing but heartaches.

.
.
.
.
.

maybe a song would better describe how i feel right now.
well, i've found one.
enjoy.



i hope you guys will understand.

It's been long.

hello my dear readers.
though i think i have none but still, i just felt like blogging today.
i mean like, yeah it's been ages.
well, term 3 started off like this.



and



and it got worse.
hahaha.
innoweek on the first week was pretty fun, cos' it was probably one of the most meaningful ones we've done so far.
the past years was just.....
bleh.
accomplished cos' we had 391 likes and counting :)
ultimate yay.
yes and my results for term 2 turned out to be terrible.
gotta buck up alot this term.
hope i don't get too busy with harp and pb stuff.

i'll be mia till............

O'S ARE OVER.
HAHAHAHAHA.
we'll see.